Thursday, May 17, 2012

Are Men being squeezed out of boy's lives?

And really, is it just boys, or all kids?  After reading a blog post over here about boys growing up without Men in their lives, it got me thinking.

I would have to say that I am a traditionalist. I don't mean to insult but I think women should be in the home. With their kids. This however is not to say that this is the right choice for ALL women. Because its not.There are some fantastic stay at home dads out there.

This reminds me of a post a friend of mine over at High Gloss and Sauce wrote last year. No, I'm not going to tell you what it was, but trust me, it also got me thinking.

We live in a world right now where men with our kids is scary. Where we have to watch what we say when complementing men in hopes that it doesn't come off all sexual predator. A few bad apples (and a failing justice system) have ruined it for everyone.

I think there is more to it than just men being in kids lives. I think its also the Quality of the Man that is important. Does that Man show outward affection to those that love him? Does he have a love for God?

I understand that schools and churches are trying to protect our kids.  But what about the other places that should be protecting our kids. Restaurants with indoor/outdoor playgrounds, theme parks, indoor/outdoor play areas. Do all of these places run background checks on their employees? Not all. Drugs tests, sure. But to find out if the male (or female) you are hiring has a sexual predator background, well that just takes too much time/work/money. Right up until some parent finds out that their kid was abused at your place of business, then you are out not only the cost of the lawsuit, but the bad publicity.

Anytime anyone is going to be in contact with children, a background check should be done. What a better way to lessen the chances of a predator coming into close contact with kids. I say lessen, because there are always the few that have not been caught.

Back to the whole men getting a bad rap thing. Its not just Men that abuse!! Women do it too, but as society, we are much more trusting of females. I don't believe that they are any less likely to abuse. Men are called all sorts of things; womanizer, workaholic, abuser. And yet, women can be those things as well. They can be cougars, workaholics, abusers. But instead, society appears to applaud them for those kind of behaviors or completely ignore them. There are shows on mainstream TV that point in this direction. Even Kids tv doesn't show a lot of male influence. Cat in The Hat Knows a lot About That comes to mind. The only "male" influence is a cat.

What ever happened to Men being Men? Have women really been trying to push them out and victimize them in an attempt to be more "equal"? I don't honestly believe that women and men can be equal. There are just some jobs that God designed men to be better at and do better. Just as there are some jobs that God designed women to be better at. But for us to sit here and say that men and women should be equal, well its just not physically possible. Men are becoming more and more of a minority because of the views of society. I just don't think that is fair.

I want my boys to grow up working hard. Being hard workers. Earning what they have in life, rather than expecting it to be handed to them based on their gender, sexual preference or race. I want the same things for myself. I don't want a job just because the company has to employ so many women. I want it because I earned it. Because I am the best fit for the job. And if I am not the best fit for the job, I am not going to go running into the night screaming FOUL because I am a woman and the job was given to a man.

Next time you are out and about, take a look around. How many non family member men do you and your kids come into contact with? How many women?


  1. Great Post ! Both Mike and I loved it !

    1. You shared with Mike? Sheesh ;-) Glad you both liked it.

  2. Oh I could not agree with you more. Like you, I'm a traditionalist...but try not to shove my beliefs on other people either. I love being a SAHM but I recognize it's not for all moms:) BUT, Fathers do play such a crucial role in raising kiddos. I am eternally grateful that my own husband is such a devoted father who makes it a huge priority to be around our kiddos...doing all the goofy stuff kids should be doing!